"Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten virgins, which took their lamps, and went forth to meet the bridegroom. And five of them were wise, and five were foolish. They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them: But the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept. And at midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him. Then all those virgins arose, and trimmed their lamps. And the foolish said unto the wise, Give us of your oil; for our lamps are gone out. But the wise answered, saying, Not so; lest there be not enough for us and you: but go ye rather to them that sell, and buy for yourselves. And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came; and they that were ready went in with him to the marriage: and the door was shut. Afterward came also the other virgins, saying, Lord, Lord, open to us. But he answered and said, Verily I say unto you, I know you not. Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh."
Brad Fitzpatrick may be likened to one of the five wise virgins in Matthew chapter 25 who took oil in their vessels in preparation for the coming of their bridegroom as he has clearly avoided such worldly distractions as dating therefore allowing more time to devote to running the LiveJournal which has helped me to spread the Word of God to well over a hundred thousand souls and even though none of them have been saved at least they have been warned so that when they stand before the judgment seat and the Lord looks to see that their names are not found in the Lamb's Book of Life and they try to pretend they didn't know they needed salvation the Lord can remind them that they heard it here first on the LiveJournal before He points His gigantic holy thumb toward the floor. Amen.
Therefore I would like to take this opportunity to invite those who have not already done so to vote for LJ in the Webbies People's Voice Award. Amen. But remember that unlike our LJ founder most of you are more likely compared to the foolish virgins who slumbered with no oil in their lamps and if you put off voting until later your Vicodin hangovers and your methamphetamine withdrawals will no doubt cause you to forget all about the Webbies and therefore I would admonish you to vote now while the idea is still ricocheting around in your narcotics-infested minds. Amen.
I must however caution those of you who rejoice not in the truth but in unrighteousness to avoid the temptation to imitate your father Satan who also happens to be the father of lies (John 8:44) by voting for the LiveJournal more than one time as the Webbies use a form of technology known as "cookies" and as such might be in a position to disqualify a web site for using such flagrantly dishonest means of acquiring votes. Amen.